i want to grow.
this has been one of my main desires this week. problem is, i feel like i don't know how.
last night i went with mark and trevor to their bi-weekly home church community. it is a group of 12 or so 20-something men and women who live in Hamilton, living and meeting in community to strengthen themselves closer to the Lord's Spirit. being with them last night was super encouraging. for 2 hours the group shared stories, hopes of vision for the community, testimonies, desires of prayer, and encouragement for others. people shared about how they wanted to listen to the Spirit more intentionally, how others wanted to be bold in asking for signs and wonders from God so that others may believe in him more fully, others were honest about the difficulties of showing love or sharing faith. hands were laid to encourage and pray for others.i sensed a bubbling desire from many individuals of just wanting more from Jesus. and i trust He will give...because He is very generous.
many of these folks i know well or at least recognize from camp or i've met in Hamilton. mark shared with me earlier that he and others had felt like the group had been 'divinely appointed,' as a group that was working on the spring crew at camp, continued to meet together, continued to live together in an encouraging community through out the year. i believed him.
and i felt it. and i saw it.
there was an atmosphere that was unique last night. men and women sharing conversation, laughs, prayer. i felt such a presence of freedom, genuine-ness, and joy. praise to the God of Love.
as I sit here reflecting on my exposure to that group last night, i wonder if i am feeling what many people who have not met Jesus (or are following not Jesus, or have not experienced Jesus, etc.) feel for the first time once they encounter authentic community, strengthened and kindled by the powerful love of Jesus Christ. i sense in myself a curiosity, a want for more. not necessarily for that specific group, or those individuals...but for what I sensed God was doing there.
where does that leave me? i thought i knew what genuine community looked like? yet last night, God showed me a whole new picture of it. not to raise or lower anything/anyone in comparison. but the community i experienced last night was new, and different.
John 17:22-24
' " I have given them the glory that you gave me, that they may be one as we are one- I in them and you in me—so that they may be brought to complete unity. Then the world will know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me.
“Father, I want those you have given me to be with me where I am, and to see my glory, the glory you have given me because you loved me before the creation of the world." '
and where this leaves me this morning: i desire more of Jesus. and i want that to be true and continuous. i want to desire Him even when i don't want to (which in itself doesn't make sense). i want to be more honest with myself in front of Jesus, not only about my short-comings, but about my true desires and trust in Him. because i want to go deeper in my relationship with Him. i want to listen closer to His voice, and to be obedient in what i hear. yet so often i recognize that i am a 'silly ragamuffin,' so unable to grow or improve myself. Jesus is the only one that can do that in/for/with me.
if you have a similar hope, ask the one who cultivates goodness and gives good gifts to His children.
Jesus make me honest. Jesus make me bold. Jesus make me grow.
this has been one of my main desires this week. problem is, i feel like i don't know how.
last night i went with mark and trevor to their bi-weekly home church community. it is a group of 12 or so 20-something men and women who live in Hamilton, living and meeting in community to strengthen themselves closer to the Lord's Spirit. being with them last night was super encouraging. for 2 hours the group shared stories, hopes of vision for the community, testimonies, desires of prayer, and encouragement for others. people shared about how they wanted to listen to the Spirit more intentionally, how others wanted to be bold in asking for signs and wonders from God so that others may believe in him more fully, others were honest about the difficulties of showing love or sharing faith. hands were laid to encourage and pray for others.i sensed a bubbling desire from many individuals of just wanting more from Jesus. and i trust He will give...because He is very generous.
many of these folks i know well or at least recognize from camp or i've met in Hamilton. mark shared with me earlier that he and others had felt like the group had been 'divinely appointed,' as a group that was working on the spring crew at camp, continued to meet together, continued to live together in an encouraging community through out the year. i believed him.
and i felt it. and i saw it.
there was an atmosphere that was unique last night. men and women sharing conversation, laughs, prayer. i felt such a presence of freedom, genuine-ness, and joy. praise to the God of Love.
as I sit here reflecting on my exposure to that group last night, i wonder if i am feeling what many people who have not met Jesus (or are following not Jesus, or have not experienced Jesus, etc.) feel for the first time once they encounter authentic community, strengthened and kindled by the powerful love of Jesus Christ. i sense in myself a curiosity, a want for more. not necessarily for that specific group, or those individuals...but for what I sensed God was doing there.
where does that leave me? i thought i knew what genuine community looked like? yet last night, God showed me a whole new picture of it. not to raise or lower anything/anyone in comparison. but the community i experienced last night was new, and different.
John 17:22-24
' " I have given them the glory that you gave me, that they may be one as we are one- I in them and you in me—so that they may be brought to complete unity. Then the world will know that you sent me and have loved them even as you have loved me.
“Father, I want those you have given me to be with me where I am, and to see my glory, the glory you have given me because you loved me before the creation of the world." '
and where this leaves me this morning: i desire more of Jesus. and i want that to be true and continuous. i want to desire Him even when i don't want to (which in itself doesn't make sense). i want to be more honest with myself in front of Jesus, not only about my short-comings, but about my true desires and trust in Him. because i want to go deeper in my relationship with Him. i want to listen closer to His voice, and to be obedient in what i hear. yet so often i recognize that i am a 'silly ragamuffin,' so unable to grow or improve myself. Jesus is the only one that can do that in/for/with me.
if you have a similar hope, ask the one who cultivates goodness and gives good gifts to His children.
Jesus make me honest. Jesus make me bold. Jesus make me grow.